Juice

It's almost been two months since I've lost Mom.

And it seems like two years.

The thing about grief....it's paralyzing, and it's brutal; and it manifests itself in many different ways.

For me, I resented that the world was going on without her.

I felt guilty every time that I smiled because she wasn't here, and I wasn't supposed to be happy knowing that she wasn't here.

It was hard to think of the good times we had because it HURT SO BAD every time I thought of her.

Heartache should be called Bodyache because there have been days that every part of me hurt because I miss her so much.

In a completely unexpected way,  losing Mom released my creativity again or at least gave me a channel for my thoughts and my energy.

I had gotten pretty lax on my painting and sewing and decorating due to work.  Having to figure out how to incorporate Mom's things into our house really helped me to think about how the house would best work.

Stay tuned.....